I have strong but correct opinions.
C. Schasel 2021
On His Holy Dietary Choices
I only eat air and land food, and most of the air food is flightless birds.
On the Necessity of Internal Organs
Meh, you don’t need a liver.
Await the Second Coming
I relish the opportunity to learn. Therefore, I must move on.
On Purpose
What is our purpose in life but to be unethical.
Chips & Their Salinity
I have yet to find a chip that is too salty.
On the Daily Intake of Ice Cream
I only got four pints of ice cream.
The secret to weight loss
My thoughts on foodborne illness is that it is a shortcut to weight loss.
The End Is Near
I am resolute in my feelings of doom.
On the Philosophy of Ethics
Only I determine what is ethical.
On Eating Chips Also Eaten by a Mouse
If I die, I die.
I am the Arbiter of Sneeze
I could have no hands and still stop myself from sneezing. Alternatively, I could have five hands and still not sneeze.
On Identification of Species
Cows are just big dogs.
On Finding Meritorious Conversation
Sometimes, the only way to have an intelligent conversation is to talk to yourself.
On the Disappointments of Dairy Delights
The worst part about ice cream is when you get to the bottom of the pint and you have to accept than you won’t have ice cream again until tomorrow.
Why stop at micro-plastics?
I want macro-plastics in my brain.
Salt is Life
I drink the pretzel salt at the bottom of the bag.